Self condemnation

 It is said that you can not be forgiven unless you forgive yourself first. The Word says that God will forgive you of anything if you will only return to him, think about the prodigal son. Here is where it gets tricky, most believers want to be forgiven but not to return. They want atonement for their future sins because they already have plans to sin.

 It is true that you can be filled with self loathing, because you believe that what you have done is so horrible that there is no way God could love you, and you can get angry with yourself or lose faith in yourself. And it is true that you may need to learn to forgive yourself before you can recognize that God has already forgiven you. But it is not true that God can be manipulated into forgiving the sinful intent of your heart.

 Why are you doing what your doing is more important to God than what you are doing. Lets say you hit someone with your car, imagine that you killed them, now imagine that its a 12 year old boy that ran into the street chasing a ball, imagine the burden of grief this would cause, imagine asking the parents for forgiveness, imagine asking yourself for forgiveness. Self condemnation is not the same thing as knowing what your doing is wrong. Self condemnation comes from not knowing you can be forgiven or a felling of unworthiness. 

 You may be condemning yourself with your actions and there is forgiveness, but forgiveness comes when the intent of your heart is returned to Gods love. Atonement for future sins is a ploy to convince you that God is O.K. with sin, like getting permission. Its not true. It wasn't true for Sodom and Gomorrah, it wasn't true for the Israelites, and it isn't true for you.

 YHVH said, through Christ, that if a righteous man turns his ways to sin then every righteous act will be forgotten and if a sinful man turns toward righteousness then every sinful act will be forgotten. That's forgiveness. Don't try and justify you evil intentions, God knows your intentions.

 If you have done something wrong or caused something terrible to happen and are feeling greatly pained by your actions then turn to God, seek Him and humble yourself, He has already forgiven you. Find counseling or therapy to help you to forgive yourself and know that God loves you. But if your trying to find a way to get into Gods good graces and still live a life of sin then you may not like the results you will get. 

 Sin is like a drug and if you find yourself struggling with not sinning, again God knows your heart and He knows if you hate your sin or love it. Be real with yourself, you are not perfect, but don't think your fooling God. Its why you sin that is important, not how you sin. If your in an addictive cycle of sin fix your heart on God and His Word and I know He will forgive you even while your struggling to stop sinning, but using Gods forgiveness as a reason to sin will leave you empty.

- The Responsible Christian